The Lighter Side
Democrats demand complete withdrawal from Iran by 2025!
By Frank Scott
Online Journal Contributing Writer


Apr 3, 2007, 01:09

Showing a boldness and determination that made many political observers gasp, the Democrats demanded that Bush evacuate the troops from Iran by the year 2025.

�We hold the president fully responsible for leading us to believe the threat posed by Iran, so even though he will have long been out of office and the war directed exclusively by other members of the Wimpocrat bipartisan group, we will keep his feet to the fire even when he�s gone.�

Assured by the this new show of courage and hard work by the representative from San Fran Telavivsco, the party was able to raise $17 billion for its next campaign: making Israel the fifty first state.

Meanwhile, the race for democracy�s real meaning reached a fever pitch in the campaign for the campaign to be in the campaign for president in 2008. The leading dollar hunter-gatherers were recently stunned by a dramatic announcement of critical family illness, leading all to desperately seek personal tragedies that might help their financial procurement.

In retaliation for the emotional announcement that John Edwards would continue campaigning even with his wife diagnosed with recurring cancer, Hillary clinton said she will continue her run for president, despite her marital problems concerning her husband�s sexual addiction.

�This great country, not to leave Israel out, needs my leadership far too much for me to allow my husband�s terminal psychological condition to stop my campaign.�

The Obama campaign immediately called a press conference at which the charismatic, dynamic, articulate and least fearful to white people candidate expressed his continued run for president, despite his own terminal condition.

�My serious case of terminal CLAD (content lacking addictive disorder ) will not stop my run for the presidency, nor will it stop my vaguely hopeful speeches which strike stylish emotional tones while staying free of substantial content. And despite the horrors of CLAD, i pledge my continued and dedicated support for Israel.�

Motivated by all these fighting words, the Biden camp announced that he would no longer conduct gas attacks on his own people by speaking publicly. He vowed to remain mute for the rest of the campaign, using sign language to communicate with the masses. Biden vowed that would not stop him from clearly articulating, in a clear, articulate and non-redundant fashion, unlike the other white candidates but very much like Barak, who, he signed, was the cleanest of all the black candidates.

Dennis Kucinich continued his unrealistic and hopelessly under financed campaign by insisting that troops must be evacuated from Iraq now, and that our health care should not be put in the hands of private insurers, but be covered by a national single payer program. Party leadership and major pundits agreed that he was not a serious candidate, since he insisted on issues of substance, had no charisma and was not fervent enough in his support for Israel. But his supporters claim he is more firmly connected to the establishment than many seem to understand, pointing out that he and Bill Gates use the same barber.

President Bush said he would no longer follow the advice given him by the brilliant (according to Democrats ) strategist, Karl Rove.

�I will continue listening to god, since she has never lied to me, but i will be very careful about listening to Rove since he forced me into Iraq. Really, i wanted to attack Iran, which, with the help of God, congress and the Israeli lobby, i plan to do, soon.�

Congress and the Israeli lobby promised the president support in this policy. God has not been heard from. For years now. Apparently, God is no April Fool.

Copyright � 2007 Frank Scott. All rights reserved.

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