The Lighter Side
Winning our way out of Iraq with the math weapon
By W. O. Coach
Online Journal Contributing Writer


Dec 19, 2006, 00:25

Perhaps we've been a tad too hard on Bush and his stratergery for winning the war he started in Iraq. Simple math suggests he might have known what he's doing all along.

Check this out:

Iraq started with a population of 26 million people before the invasion. According to one report they are killing themselves (with our help), at the rate of about two hundred thousand a year. And another report claims that so far 1.6 million have fled to Jordan, Syria and elsewhere, or about a half a million leaving the country each year since the invasion. If these numbers are accurate, and they continue at the same rate, Iraq will be out of people in just under 34 years.

On the other hand, we have 140,000 of our kids on the ground in Iraq who are being killed at a rate of about a thousand a year. In 34 years we'll still have 106,000 soldiers there with no Iraqis left to fight.

Woo-hoo, we win.

However, this calculation assumes that our injured, about 7,000 a year, can get patched up and sent back for more of the fun. If this isn't the case, and they can't return to the "noble cause," Bush's stratergery has a slight glitch. For under this last scenario, in 17 and a half years we would be down to our last guy standing with more than 12 million pretty pissed off Iraqis circling him.

But, with careful military planning and again by employing simple math, even this possibility can be overcome. All we have to do is send 12 million plus one more soldier to Iraq tomorrow, and sweet victory is secured.